I had the opportunity to speak at a Pride launch for a national corporation this past week. As a part of this experience, I was asked to give my opinion about how people can support and be allies for LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) people. When I was a teenager, I used to be a national advocate for LGBT teens facing bullying in schools. Since then, I have spent a lot of time thinking about what it means to be an ally to LGBT people both in the workplace and in the community at large.
When I came out in 2008, as a 13-year-old middle schooler, I endured significant bullying and discrimination. It led me to do the advocacy work that I devoted my teenage years to, and it was what first made me want to be a lawyer. In the last few years, I have felt more unease over the state of LGBT acceptance than I ever have before. This has led me to reflect more often on the unique role allies can play in LGBT acceptance and affirmation. One of the most important things I took away from recent reflection and the research I conducted to prepare for the corporate panel discussion was that LGBT people are currently experiencing serious uncertainty about our place in the world and professional spaces. On an individual level, I have attempted to solve that problem by bringing up LGBT issues during job interviews and before joining professional organizations. I am lucky enough to work and belong to organizations that accept me for who I am. With that being said, though, there are many other ways professionals can make LGBT people feel accepted and supported.
For example, when I first came out, seeing a rainbow logo during Pride Month was exciting for me. It was not nearly as common back then, and it was a sign of important progress. Now, though, I look for more than a pride statement and rainbow logo. Instead, I am looking to see how organizations respond when things become difficult. To me, it is not enough for an organization to issue a mission statement or to acknowledge its LGBT members. Instead, I look for an organization to foster a culture of unapologetic acceptance of LGBT people.
This is particularly important for transgender and gender non-conforming people. Fostering a culture of acceptance for LGBT people means accepting us as we are, not expecting assimilation. Some people may feel like their most authentic selves in makeup or wearing nail polish. Others may not. Regardless, it is incredibly important to value an LGBT person’s authentic expression. The LGBT community is an incredibly diverse community with different feelings on gender expression. What I think is most important is that the members of the larger communities that we work in keep an open mind and understand that the expression of our identities is a core part of who we are. Welcoming dialogue around those nuances goes much further than a simple tagline or statement.
Finally, focusing on education is incredibly important. I acknowledge that it is difficult to be educated on every aspect of the LGBT community. I came out in 2008, and I am still learning. Instead, a willingness to learn and an open-minded approach when someone learns about a new aspect of our community can be really powerful and affirming. Life is complicated, and it is hard to think of something more personal than sexual orientation and gender identity/expression. However, working together to cultivate a society that accepts and celebrates the LGBT community will only create a stronger and more just society. Being invited to speak at a national organization is a great start. We still have a lot of work to do, and it will take both LGBT people and our allies to continue the path towards progress. Being asked to speak on a panel for a corporation that wanted to have deeper conversations and address the complexity of these issues gave me tremendous hope for the future, and hope is what will get us through these difficult times.
